One Roof With Five Hot Jerks

Maxine’s Point of View

“W-Why? What are we going to talk about?” I asked as I followed him. We’re now in the garden but he still hasn’t stopped walking.

He stopped walking and turned to me. Wow, did he wait for me to ask before he stopped? Tch.

He tilted his head, “Aren’t you going to say something? Like, ‘sorry for leaving you, Alyn’ something like that?”

Why does he look mad? I just did that for him. To set him free and so I could help him. I don’t want to see him struggle to choose between me and Elaine. That’s why I did that. I don’t want things to get hard for him. I just did those for him. Why is he mad? Isn’t he thankful instead? I should be the one who’s mad, right? He said that I was the only one for him but then he got confused with his feelings when Elaine came back. What kind of bullshit is that? My gosh, I’m getting annoyed just by thinking about that.

I averted my eyes, “Why would I? I just did what I had to do.”

“Wow, really…” He scoffed, “After having sex with me. After using my body, you just left me. Instead of talking to me personally, you just left a letter. And the worst thing of all is you drugged me. You should have talked to me that day, I might accept it if you do that.”

I said sorry to the letter I gave him for drugging him. Has he forgotten or he just wants me to remember all that I have done to him? Tch.

“Why are you talking about that now? It happened in the past. Don’t you know the saying that the past is the past? You can’t turn back time. We can’t,” I responded.

“Don’t you regret what you did?” His eyes shrunk, “Do you really want to get away from me so badly, so you did that? You said in that letter that you love me, you love me but you still choose to give up on me and leave me?” He sniggered, “Have you… Really loved me?”

What now? Is he doubting my feelings? Wow, does he really have the right now to doubt my feelings?

“Who are you to doubt me? I just did that for your own happiness even if the replacement of that is painful for me. I endured it for your own happiness! I accepted it, I did it anyway even though I knew it would hurt me in the end! So, how… How could you question my feelings?” I clenched my lips to stop my tears.This content © Nôv/elDr(a)m/a.Org.

Damn. He didn’t know how much I suffered just because of what I did. He doesn’t know everything. He knows nothing for Pete’s sake! How dare he!? Fuck it!

He stepped closer to me. He caressed my cheek softly. Like, he was being careful not to break a fragile thing. He bit his lower lip and took a deep breath.

“So, do you still love me?” He asked with a soft tone.

“Do you think I would still love you after causing me pain?” I smirked. I removed his hand from my cheek. Of course, the answer is yes. I still love you, Alyn. Still, I didn’t say that.

“Yes,” he smiled. “Because I still love you after causing me pain, too.”

Damn it. Don’t fall for his sparkling eyes, Maxine! Don’t fall for his words. Your relationship right now is just because of the contract! He doesn’t love you anymore. You’re just arranged with him that’s why he’s acting like that. He just doesn’t have a choice. He just wants entertainment, Max.

But so what? I was the one who left him and suffered so much pain. Even if he doesn’t love me anymore it’s okay because I was the one who hurt him. I hurt him and caused him pain, too, just like what he said. Even what he is feeling for me right now is not true, I don’t care. This time I want to be selfish. If his feelings faded, I would do everything just to win his heart back. But the question is… Would he still love me back?

“No, I don’t love you anymore,” I said. I turned around and walked away.

What I said is the opposite of what I want to say. What I did is the opposite of what I want to do. I want to say I love him. I want to hug him and never let him go. However, I don’t want to look like a fool. I was the one who left him, so I deserve to suffer more. I was the one who left him, so I don’t have the right to get him back.

We met again because of my parents’ business. I’m not buying what Dad said, that it’s for my future and not for their business. Maybe they just want to hide it from me.

If me and Alyn were really for each other, we shouldn’t have met again like this. Our parents just arranged us in a marriage that we both don’t want.

I’m not saying that I don’t want to marry him, it’s just… I want to marry him badly at the church, that’s why I’m disappointed.

“Sign here,” Dad ordered. He even pointed in the paper where I should sign.

I didn’t say any words and just did what he wanted me to do. I signed the paper and after that, Alyn signed it.

He looked at me as soon as he finished signing the papers. We’re now married, and yeah, only on paper. 20 years of age is young for a person to get married but so what? It’s just on paper so it’s not a big deal.

“I’m going to bed,” I stood up and turned away. I didn’t wait for them to speak, I just walked away instantly.

I was about to open the door of my room when someone suddenly stopped the door. I turned around with my brows furrowed. My facial expressions changed in an instant when I almost kissed Alyn. The heck? Who told him to get closer to me?

“Are you going to sleep already?” He asked, his face still a few inches away from me.

I turned my head to the right side so I could breath and just averted my gaze, “Yeah. Y-You should sleep, as well.”

“We’re going to our own house tomorrow,” he stood up straight.

I turned to him. My brows furrowed from what he said, “I’m not informed about that.”

Since when did they bought a house? The heck?

He nodded, “Because I want to be the one to inform you.” He smiled and messed my hair up, “Go ahead. We’re going to wake up early tomorrow, you should really sleep now.”

I averted my eyes. What the heck? Is he trying to seduce me with his smile? Damn it.

“I’m not going with you,” I said and immediately went inside my room.

I still heard him knock on my door while calling out my name but I just ignored him. I even went to my bathroom so I couldn’t hear his voice.

Damn it. I think my heart is about to explode. It’s pounding like crazy and I think I’m going crazy, too. I know our marriage is just on paper but fuck! I’m so happy that I could die! I can’t fucking believe that Alyn is really mine now. But I’m afraid of one thing, what if Alyn meets someone else and files a divorce paper for me? Arg, damn it!