Men 157
MY Possessive Mafia Men
Chapter 157: I Want To Take A Break From Them Chapter 157: I Want To Take A Break From Them Angelia
The three of them had built me up, made me comfortable in my own body and made me see myself in a different light, a better light. Most importantly, with them, I had been alive. I had been happier than ever and found thrill and excitement in days that used to be dull and uneventful. And so, thinking of that instead of the what ifs, made it an easy decision. As cliche as it sounded, they brought colors into my life and I hadn't realized I had seen everything in shades of gray until they came along. I wasn't ready to let go of the colors, the thrill and the happiness, I wasn't prepared to let go of my men. So for how long did I have to stay away from them? Because if there was one thing that would kill me, it would be watching them move on with someone else while I kept my distance to keep them safe. Of course, I would do it if it meant them not getting hurt even if it would end up hurting me. It seemed I was just as self-sacrificing as the heroine I had read in books only. I was about a hundred percent more afraid than they ever were but I never said anything about being a bada***like them. I was only a girl who didn't t know any better. "We were home!"
Andy' voice filled the living room, making my heart ache for the same cheery feeling I had felt only a few hours ago. He gave me a quick hello before bustling into the kitchen with a grocery bag, followed by James, his unofficial boyfriend. I had already known he was coming to eat dinner with us for Andy's text had totally forgotten about it.
"Hi, there, beautiful lady." James grinned at me from the kitchen, helping Andy with the groceries and putting them away in the fridge.
"Hi, Jan
James.
How has your day been?" I asked, doing my best to keep my voice steady and normal.
It would be hard keeping shit from my best friend especially since he knew me so well but I had hoped he had shrugged it off as me still being emotional which I guess he would expect me to be. "Better now, I have missed my baby boy like crazy." He said, nodding at Andy. I smiled but it felt strained, knowing I was the reason he hadn't seen him. James noticed and grimaced.
"I really didn't mean it like that, it is like they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder." He
added.
"I am also glad that you had him, I know the need for a friend to lean on."
I
Chapter 157: I Want To Take A Break From Them
"Yes, he has been good to me." I mumbled.
James didn't know all I the details of what had gone down but I was pretty sure he had pieced together some of it like the fact that I had been dating three men. Although he hadn't judged me, not once. I turned towards Andy, who was leaning against the counter with a small smile on his beautiful face but he looked haggard. "How was work?" I asked and he sighed I dramatically.
"If I have to work one more shit with Ben, I will end it all."
Ben worked at the cafe with us, he was entitled-and lazy because his aunt owned the cafe and felt he could get away with anything which was correct. He did get away with not doing shit. I rarely had to work with him. Andy wasn't as lucky. The last time I had worked with him, goodness, it had been hell. Ben had busted into the lunchroom while he knew I was changing which was uncomfortable in itself. Still, worse was the look he had given me when Marshall picked me up after my shift. Long story cut short, Ben had asked me out on several occasions and I had given the excuse that I don't date which he now knew wasn't true even though it hadn't been a lie when
had said it. He hadn't looked too happy about that. I shuddered just thinking about that guy.
"Ehm.. Angelia?"
Shaking off the m***al image of Ben's angry eyes, I looked at Andy who was now staring at the bouquet of flowers and forgotten dessert chocolate covered strawberries and chocolate cake.
What i is all I this?" he asked but he already knew the answer to that, seeing as he had taken the liberty of reading one of the notes which were currently in his hand.
I didn't mind, something I figured he already knew. We don't keep secrets from each other, I frown. We didn't keep secrets and now, though it was inevitable.
"The guys sent me apology gifts." I shrugged as if it wasn't a big deal but my heart still bounced around just thinking about them.
That was until I remembered the other gift I had gotten. I had to steel myself from the fright that wanted to take over my body again. I couldn't let him know something was wrong. He whistled as he read one of the cards.
"This even makes me fall a little bit in love with them." He muttered, making James laugh.
James didn't know much about my men but at the same time, I didn't care if he found out. It wasn't like I was ashamed, though my mind still cringed a bit out of old habits.
Chapter 157:1 Want To Take A Break From ThemCòntens bel0ngs to Nô(v)elDr/a/ma.Org
"Do you want to talk about it?" Andy asked louder
"Not really." I said, if I did, I was afraid I would break down and I couldn't afford that right now. My mental state was fragile enough already.
"Fair enough but you know I am here if you ever do want to talk.
"Yes, I know. You are a good friend, Andy.*
"You are just as good, girly." He joined me in the living room with a smile but it dipped as soon as he saw the bag next to the sofa.
What is going on?" His eyes went from the bag to me, his gaze filled with confusion and surprise. I could see James quietly walking to the bathroom to give us some privacy.
"I think it is time I got back to my own apartment. I am sure you are missing some alone time with your man." My smile felt stuffy and unnatural but if he noticed, I hoped he thought it was more so because of what had happened in the past few days instead of what might have happened while he was at work. "That is b***it and you know it, you can stay for as long as you want." He said, looking about ready to throw my bag back into his room.
I knew
he wouldn't be a fan of me leaving especially after seeing how much of a wreck I had been. To be honest, I was sure he would prefer it if I stayed longer.
"I know and I really appreciate it, it is just....I am ready to return to my own place and move on." "What do you mean, move on? Have you figured out what you are going to do about your men?"
He took a seat bes
a seat beside me on the couch and gave me all of his attention but I did notice his eyes sneak a peek once more at the gifts on the kitchen counter. I tried to ignore his use of words, your men. I guess they weren't mine any longer, they couldn't be even if my mind wanted to pretend that wasn't the case. Hopefully, when this is all over.
"Yes," I swallowed, my mouth suddenly dry.
"I want to take a break from them. Right now, I need to focus on myself. I just need a few weeks or months to get myself sorted out." His shock was evident on his face but he reeled it in quickly. "What made you come to that decision?"
"I am not sure I will ever get over their betrayal. How can I trust them to be honest with me going forward when they have lied to me since the second I met them?" My own lie felt bitter on my 3/4 Chapter 157: I Want To Take A Break From Them tongue.
The truth was, now that the option had been taken away from me, I could clearly feel how much I still wanted to be with them. I wanted us to rebuild the trust and move on with them. The notes they had sent me this morning along with their sweet gifts had warmed my heart to them and the possibility of becoming an us again. It was only when I knew that wasn't my choice anymore that I realized how unprepared I was to let them go or let what he had slip through my fingers. Instead of life giving me lemons to make lemonade, I got a rock and a fucking hard place. "Okay," he nodded.
"If that's how you feel." I could see him hesitating as if he had more to say but in the end, he chose not to. "Yes, it is."
**
It wasn't, don't get me wrong. I was still p***d at them and hurt but I guess some part of me had never given up on us. I just needed time to realize that myself. My life had turned into a sideshow consisting of drama and thriller and I didn't like it one bit. Why couldn't
everything just be romance and a field of daisies?