Love for the Librarian

DYLAN’S P. O. V.

This is killing me. I mean I am busy with school, being a dad and trying to work when I can. I have started with investments. My father assists with that, but I get a regular paycheck from the Library. For some reason recently Polly has been really nice with me. I am not sure if she feels sorry for me or if she is starting to like me. But even with how busy I am I still miss Riley.

Then there is this whole date thing. She wants me to date. I lied a couple of times about having a date. I figured if she thought that I was doing what she wanted she would take me back, but apparently that isn’t going to work. I just want her back. She says there is something going on that is going to change things. This just has me worried. I mean she got sick, what if it is something that has her in a wheelchair or something. Or she can’t have kids. I mean it has to be something like that right. Something to make her think that I wouldn’t want her. Cause honestly I can’t think of anything that would make me not want her.

Today I was approached by a girl from class. She wanted to go out for a drink. Of course my first instinct was to say no. I took her number and told her I would think about it. I am not so sure that I will ever call her, but then I get off the phone with Riley where she insists that I date again. Why the hell won’t she just take me back? So I call up Martha and see if she can come watch Riley. She is thrilled that I am going out. So now I just need to call the girl.

“Hey, this is Dylan. Are you free tonight for that drink?”

“Oh, hey. Yeah, I can be ready in like an hour. There is a party down the street that we can hit. Does that sound good?”

“Yeah, So I’ll meet you at the front gate of the school.” I do not want her coming to my house right now. “I’ll see you then Elle.”

“Ok, I’ll see you then.” She clicks off. I can’t help but hear that she is actually happy. I don’t know what I have done to make her feel that way but I am sure that it won’t last long.

It doesn’t take me long to get dressed and ready to go. Martha is here right on schedule. Of course I try to back out but that just has Martha pushing me out the door. “You need to have a night out. You are more than a dad and a student. Go let loose.”

“You know it isn’t that simple.” I give her a pointed look. She knows I am trying to get Riley back.

“Do what the girl says. Enjoy your youth. She wants you sure so be sure. Telling her you are going on dates that you aren’t going on, isn’t going to do it. You need to live.”

Then she literally pushes me out the door. I pulled in front of the college about twenty minutes later. There standing at the entrance is Elle. I mean she is a pretty enough girl. She just isn’t doing it for me. All I want is Riley.

I get out and she meets me about half way. “Alright so this party is within walking distance?” I ask her. I am not being polite at all. I didn’t even tell her that she looked nice. God I am damaged. “You look nice.” Of course she noticed that it was an afterthought.

“Thanks. Yeah the party is just down here.” She points down the right. I start walking with her next to me. “So you live off campus. Do you have a bunch of roommates?”

I laugh. “I have one, if you can call him that.”

“What does that mean? Do you still live with a parent or something?” She looks confused.

“Or something. Look what I am about to tell you will probably have you running for the hills, but here it goes. I live with my son.” I wait for her reaction. She seems shocked but not running for the hills like I thought.

“Well, it’s nice to hear about a dad stepping up. Usually they leave the girl high and dry. So, how old is your son?”

“Six months. He is a cute little bugger. I don’t get out much, if you can’t tell already.” I can already start to hear the bass from the music in the house down the block. There is the party.Property belongs to Nôvel(D)r/ama.Org.

“I just thought maybe you were shy or something. I know of a lot of girls that would like to take you out.”

“Yeah, I just have a lot of baggage. I prefer to get through college and get the job that I dream of. To be honest with you I am nursing a bit of a broken heart. I love this woman who is pushing me away.”

She gets a knowing look. “Your baby momma.”

“No, I wish. To get into way too many details on a first date, I was with his mother before I started dating this other woman. His mother cheated on me. So we split. She dropped him on me and the other girl just wanted me to be sure about her. She is going to school in California.”

“So, then why are you out on a date?” She is genuinely curious.

“She told me too. She said that the only way that I could prove to her that I was living my life was to date. So I am trying. I am doing a horrible job of it. I can tell.”

“I get it. You aren’t ready for any commitment. Let’s just have some drinks and see where things go. I can be your friend tonight. I won’t expect anything from you. Let’s just enjoy the night.” She links her arm through mine and then snaps a selfie. “For prosperity. You can post it on social media and then at least you have evidence you went on a date.”

I give her a smile. “Thanks for understanding. My nanny will be pleased that you are understanding.” I laugh.

She laughs too. “Your nanny? She must have pushed you out the door.”

“That she did. She said she is tired of me being alone. I think she wants more babies to watch. I think she is nuts.”

“Is she one of those young hot nannies?” She gives me a silly look. I can tell she is going to be fun for the night.

“Na, She is old enough to be my grandma. But she is great with Riley. I am not so sure what we would do without her.”

We got to the lawn of the party. “Alright so let’s drink this girl away for the night shall we?” She pulls me into the house. First thing that happens is a red solo cup is thrust in my hand. I do not recall how much exactly I drink, but it is enough that I can’t drive home. I managed to give my address to Elle. She puts me in bed and then crawls in with me. I don’t even register it until I wake up in the middle of the night, all I want to do is call Riley.

RILEY’S P. O. V.

It has been a few months now and I am starting to get the hang of everything with being a mom. Of course my friends are helping but it is still a lot of work. I find myself sleeping as much as having a newborn and going to school will allow. So when a call comes in the middle of the night I am too damn tired to question it.

I look at the time on my phone when it rings. Three in the morning. I look at the name, Dylan. What the hell? I slide to the green phone. “Hello,” I am well aware of how groggy I sound. Hell I just went to bed two hours ago when I finally got Grace to sleep.

“Hey,” He sounds quiet, almost a whisper.

“What’s going on?” I can’t help but match his tone.

“I was thinking about you. I figured I would talk to you if I could. You don’t answer my calls most of the time.”

“Well, I don’t look forward to having my heart broken again.”

“Riley, I didn’t mean to hurt you. Can we just meet up and talk about this?”

“Are you drunk?”

“Maybe a little, why?”

“We live about three thousand miles apart. There is no meeting at the local bar for a drink.”

“Right,” There is a noticeable pause. “I miss you.”

“Dylan…” I almost told him. He has a right to know, right? But then the sound in the background stops me.

“Dylan, come back to bed.”

“You better get back, don’t want to piss off the new girl.” I quickly hung up. I can’t help the tears that are streaming down my face. This is why I don’t tell him, he has his life, I have mine. I can not be sucked in by his charms. I know I told him to move on but it still hurts.

I cry a little before I drift off to sleep.